Sexy Hot Beauty

While researching my book Men, Love & Sex, I found that not only do men and women define fidelity differently, but they also fail to talk about their definitions before something happens (with the exception of the one action everyone acknowledges as cheating). Here’s how guys tend to define the murkier areas of fidelity. Don’t like it? Then talk about it now before he steps across a line he didn’t know existed.

Flirting or Cheating? Looking at another woman?

It’s one thing if his tongue drops to the floor in your presence; that’s just plain disrespectful (though 80 percent of men have admitted to looking at other women even with their wives or girlfriends around). But cheating? Hardly. Men think there’s a huge difference between thinking and acting. “We have two sides–the committed husband/boyfriend and the ‘check out the hottie’ side. In men, the committed wins out, but the checker always exists,” says one man who responded to the Harris poll I used when researching the book. (And ladies, don’t even try to tell me you haven’t had more than a couple of thoughts and conversations about whether McDreamy or McSteamy is hotter.)

Flirting or Cheating? Hanging out with the women at work?

Here’s the real relationship danger zone: About 50 percent of guys consider having dinner and drinks with an attractive co-worker as cheating. But the more troubling stat for you may be this one: One in five men says that he secretly loves his platonic (for now) coworker. Just look at Jim and Pam on The Office, and you know exactly what I’m talking about. That’s not meant to scare you-more just to make sure you keep your eyes open (as if you don’t already) and intentions honorable.

Flirting or Cheating? Going to a strip club?

The good news for those of you who are anti-exotic dancer: Half of men think that visiting a strip club is cheating. The other half? Going to a strip club is like going to a sporting event-there’s lots of entertainment, lots of excitement, and lots of interest in watching the most talented players in action. In the poll, many men said that they feel there’s no harm in once-in-a-while visits since there’s no emotional attachment and only temporary, artificial physical attraction. “Sometimes, to be blunt about it,” one man responded in the poll, “it’s just a bit of art appreciation, and it’s nice to see another woman naked.”

Posted by David Zinczenko. Read more at Yahoo Health